Goal Weight, Schmoal Weight

My goal weight is 140 pounds. Or wait, maybe it's 145 pounds. Well, I am gaining muscle, maybe my goal weight is 150? 


Hmmm, maybe we should talk sizes. A size 2? Ahahahahaha! I just fell off my chair. Size 4? Still pretty small for me. Size 6? That sounds nice. Size 8? Wouldn't be the worst thing. But what would that look like exactly?



I've pondered these things a lot along this weight loss journey. I've stated my goals before, edited them, revised them. And now. Abandoned them. I no longer have ANY weight or clothing size goals. 


Why?


Well first, because honestly as my body changes I realize it's just too hard to pinpoint what a good weight or size will be for me. Sure I can recall numbers from high school, but my body composition is NOTHING like it was back then. Any number I come up with would basically just be pulled out of the air.


And second, focusing on those things is not mentally healthy for me. I like numbers, a lot. But trying to hold up some elusive 'finish line' number just drives me nuts. Always focusing on the destination sets me up for not enjoying the journey. That could be a long time of not enjoying where I'm at while getting to where I'm going! Plus, the whole finish line mentality isn't really truth. I will never be 'done' eating healthy or 'done' working out.


So what now? Do I give up and eat peanut butter cup ice cream straight from the carton? Well, maybe for a little while... Ha ha, NO! The effort will still be there, but the focus has changed.


I've decided to focus more on the changes I'm making, on the journey itself. And on enjoying this whole process. It's my life, and I only get one!


I've found my lobster as far as eating goes. So my goals (and especially my love for numbers) will be focusing more on my fitness. Mile times, weights I can lift, that kind of thing (more on those goals tomorrow). I am also on the hunt to find more workouts I ENJOY; it can't hurt to have a little fun on this journey!


How can I not have a goal weight? A goal size? How will I know when I'm done, when I get 'there'? I don't know. Maybe I'll just know. Or maybe none of that is even really important. What I do know is that this whole healthy lifestyle thing is forever, not just until I feel great in a pair of skinny jeans.