My half marathon is less than three weeks away.
I am not happy with my training thus far.
I set out to run 10 miles this past weekend, and couldn't, or didn't, do it. It was just a rotten run. Not a big deal in and of itself, but I've had many skipped training runs and many rotten runs the past month and a half. Running has become NOT FUN to me in this training! Not a good way to approach running 13.1 miles.
So, here's the thing: I'm considering not running my half the 19th. I'm thinking of focusing on my 5k time for a while, finding my running love again, and trying a half again in a little while.
Not because I don't think I CAN do it. I know that I could finish, but I was running it with a goal of coming in under 2 1/2 hours...that isn't looking likely at the moment. Slacking on my mid-week speed work has been an issue. I've also gained some weight back which makes the whole process feel harder. I have just been hugely off track and have not accomplished what I hoped for this race. I don't like that it has become such a chore, when I've always looked forward to my runs I now find myself looking for excuses and dreading them.
If my goal had simply been to run it, to finish it, there would be no question. But I was running it for a time goal, and training for such isn't fitting into my schedule right now or I'm not fitting it in, either way...what sense does it make to run it?
I want my passion for running back; I don't want another race to be disappointed about, that I feel like I should have, could have, would have done better.
Am I being a quitter if I don't run it? Am I rationalizing, making excuses here? Would you not run a race because you weren't going to meet your goal, your reason for running it? These are the thoughts swirling around my head. Curious to hear your perspectives. Go ahead, give it to me straight ;)